My childhood rabbi died in July. Rabbi Kassel Abelson was one of the giants of the Conservative movement. He was chair of the Committee on Jewish Law and Standards, helped found USY, was present at the creation of Camp Ramah in Wisconsin (the original Ramah), and shaped the introduction of egalitarianism and GLBTQ+inclusiveness into the movement.

The egalitarianism that he and Beth El Minneapolis instilled in me as a core value in the mid 70’s is what insulated me from swallowing the Orthodoxy that the Ba’al Teshuvah yeshivot tried to feed One Year Program students at Hebrew University. Ramah Wisconsin instilled a love of Hebrew and traditional Jewish practice. While for social reasons I was never completely comfortable in USY, I moved back and forth between the AZA and USY world, solidifying my sense that my future partner in live would have to be someone who shared my love for Judaism. So when it was time to go to the Seminary, JTS was the only option for me.

Growing up, Rabbi Abelson was mostly just the powerful Voice on the bima. He was less threatening than the other powerful Voice in the Minneapolis Conservative rabbinate who actually frightened me. He would call people out for standing up to leave the sanctuary during a sermon. Rabbi Abelson, on the other hand, radiated kindness, even though he was a distant personality. By the time I neared my teen years, Beth El had a series of assistant rabbis who took on the teen portfolio, so they were the rabbinic figures I grew close to.

I remember my first conversation with Rabbi Abelson in 1977 when I went into his office for the pre-bar mitzvah meeting. Parents of b’nai mitzvah students obvious talked, because my mother warned me that he would talk to me about going to Ramah Wisconsin and that I should tell him I was going to Camp Tikvah, not Ramah. But I did go to Ramah about two years later, in part because of the tremendous scholarship program that Rabbi Abelson had built to send kids to Ramah.

So even though my relationship with Rabbi Abelson wasn’t as deep as I wish it could have been, looking back, I clearly see how much I am a product of Rabbi Abelson. By helping to create Ramah, USY, a program of incorporating young people into learning serious synagogue skills, reading Torah and leading services, teaching the importance of inclusiveness in synagogue life, he shaped who I am today, and for that I am grateful.

In a small congregation, Rabbi and congregant have much more access to each other than in large congregations such as where I grew up. The ratio of congregants to rabbi in a small congregation allows the rabbi to get to know each member. Of course, I know those who make it a point to come to services, classes, and programs, better than those who come rarely. But I want to know each member and our business model as a congregation is based on the importance of the financial and personal contribution of each member. 

Although I grew up within a large congregational model, I do not regret devoting my career to the blessings of the small congregation.

Hebrew Words of the Month:

• Rav – rabbi
• Rebbe – the rabbi of a hasidic community, typically a charismatic leader.